JAMES COIT - BLACK POWER

A lunatic escapes from an asylum and somehow finds his way into a recording studio. This is what results. You wouldn't like him when he's angry.

J.C. MESSINA - TIME WON'T LET ME

This guy sings like a neanderthal man chewing a hedgehog

GEORGE LEMONS - FASCINATING GIRL

Arranger: hey, I know what would improve this record, let's get a couple of violinists in to add some sweetness. What, we don't have any violinists? OK, you two binmen over there, pick up those fiddles up and try and keep in time. Oh and George? If you could sing like someone's just kicked you in the gonads, that would be great.

JIMMY DELPHS - DANCING A HOLE IN THE WORLD

Jimmy, we've got some good news and some bad news for you, you won't be able to dance a hole in the world any more because we are going to have to amputate your feet. But there is some good news...the guy in the next bed wants to buy your slippers.

Oh, and also, congratulations, you have knocked the Birdie Song off the number 1 spot of worst record ever made. So a good day all round.

THE TOPICS - HAVE YOUR FUN

The band play one tune, the singers sing another. Utterly inept.

BUDDY SMITH - WHEN YOU LOSE THE ONE YOU LOVE

The first line of this appears to be "wwwwiiiibbblewillllbbbwibble", apparently sung by Joey Deacon in a language not yet discovered by western civilaztion. I've never heard the rest of the song because it bored me to sleep after 10 seconds. Music to watch paint dry by.

Jon Buck likes playing April Stevens. Unfortunately I dont like listening to it. So if your reading this JB please please please do the decent thing and smash it to bits.

[/quote

if memory serves me correctly i remember JB playing that awfull drifters not so classic satuday night at the movies ]

Ah don't say that, I've got a mint demo I need to sell!

p.s. Don Ray is fantastic

Agree totally with Pete on this one - never get tired of that one.....

p.s. Pete, but I also think JC Messina is fantastic (from a dancer's point of view)

Edited September 5, 200618 yr by grant

King bloody Mosses - i got that feeling (my ears are bleeding) - utter utter sh*te record that should not be played at all, end off.

Lady in green

Ringleaders (great group soul but way overplayed and overpriced lead me to hate this record)

Independant woman

and for the last two a couple of the disco records i've herd lately that i have know idea or wish to know who they are.

Heres another idea for James Coit

I really can't stress how friggin' easy this is. Set oven temperature of 200F.

Put a bowl upside-down on a cookie sheet, whack the record on top, and set it in the oven for about five minutes.

Pull it out (use a hotpad or you'll burn yourself!), whip off the flimsy record, and shove it down inside another bowl to mold it.

They don't give off toxic fumes or anything, and they don't get melty enough that you see fingerprints.

You've only got a few seconds to work with it though, so be quick.

I think I'm going to glue some marbles to the bottom to act as legs and use a piece of tape to cover up the hole.

Voila! Ultra trendy potato chip bowls

It must be a chin stroker thing but I'm dying to know what records they are.....

1.Lady in Green Magnetics

2.Lady in Green Magnetics

3.Lady in Green Magnetics

4.Lady in Green Magnetics

Tied for 5th and 6th spot Lady in Green Magnetics

When I first heard this I thought it was truly awful but some posters on this site seemed to rate it highly, thinking I was perhaps being hasty, or missing something, I listened again, it was even worse the second listen and, so turgid, I could not bring myself to play it all the way through, same day some kind soul sends me six mp3s by email and this crap was one of them, it haunts me.

Flip it , the other side is a great underplayed track.."heart your made of stone" brilliant tune

Lady in green is tripe

Bazza

The_Magnetics___Heart__You_re_Made_Of_Stone.MP3

Edited September 5, 200618 yr by bazza

Agree totally with Pete on this one - never get tired of that one.....

...Must be a Wigan thing with you and Pete - as someone who went there only a few times, all that I hear in 'Born A Loser' is a mediocre pop song with a dance beat, sung by an equally mediocre Country singer with no soul credentials whatsoever.

In a three way battle with Brian Hyland and Gary Lewis (both of whose Wigan-era pop stompers were considerably better IMO) , Mr. Ray was definitely 'Born The Loser'!

TONE

Edited September 5, 200618 yr by TONY ROUNCE

...Must be a Wigan thing with you and Pete - as someone who went there only a few times, all that I hear in 'Born A Loser' is a mediocre pop song with a dance beat, sung by an equally mediocre Country singer with no soul credentials whatsoever.

In a three way battle with Brian Hyland and Gary Lewis (both of whose Wigan-era pop stompers were considerably better IMO) , Mr. Ray was definitely 'Born The Loser'!

TONE

I never even thought about his voice, I just thought it was a handy little song with a great chorus!

I never even thought about his voice, I just thought it was a handy little song with a great chorus!

Oh one other thing, I never heard this played at Wigan, I'd stopped going when they were playing this one. I actually know it originally from the Lafayette in Wolvo.

Dance Dance Dance .Thats makes me leave leave leave

Nine times out of ten......................No ten out of ten, shite white pop record..

Oooooooooh don't gets us all started again....

Come on Pete,what about Bobby Kline, do you still think this aint soul ...

Dance Dance Dance .Thats makes me leave leave leave

Nine times out of ten......................No ten out of ten, shite white pop record..

Oooooooooh don't gets us all started again....

Come on Pete,what about Bobby Kline, do you still think this aint soul ...

What! somebody else doesn't rate Bobby Kline? Awful, dross, dancer-unfriendly kak Steve. On a par with Mr Soul and Bobby f******n Sheen!!

...Must be a Wigan thing with you and Pete - as someone who went there only a few times, all that I hear in 'Born A Loser' is a mediocre pop song with a dance beat, sung by an equally mediocre Country singer with no soul credentials whatsoever.

In a three way battle with Brian Hyland and Gary Lewis (both of whose Wigan-era pop stompers were considerably better IMO) , Mr. Ray was definitely 'Born The Loser'!

TONE

Nah dont associate Born A Loser with Wigan Tone, when was it palyed there as I stopped going mid 79 until early 81 - cant remember it being played beffore that mid 77 up to mid 79, or 81 onwards. First heard the tune around 86-ish I suppose

GRANT

Nah dont associate Born A Loser with Wigan Tone, when was it palyed there as I stopped going mid 79 until early 81 - cant remember it being played beffore that mid 77 up to mid 79, or 81 onwards. First heard the tune around 86-ish I suppose

GRANT

Love it!!!

Always heard that at Maximes Morecambe in the late 80s.

Sometimes I wish I could go out and not have to listen to all that black rubbish they insist on playing at Soul clubs these days...

This one is for Pete S

Do the Pearl Girl- Matta baby (The Vocal) HAHA

I cant believe me & Pete Had a bidding war over this on ebay. Shows how mad you can be when you want something no matter how crap it is!

This one is for Pete S

Do the Pearl Girl- Matta baby (The Vocal) HAHA

I cant believe me & Pete Had a bidding war over this on ebay. Shows how mad you can be when you want something no matter how crap it is!

It's not crap, it's a GREAT instrumental dancer

I'll never forget you - OJays

and

I'd think it over - Sam Fletcher (not Harvey Ave Dozen, thats awesome)

Overplayed - I hate them.

Cant believe nobody has added

Human Beinz - Nobody But Me

Pants of the skiddiest kind

Jackie Whatsherface - Naughty Boy

bloody gets on my tits.........

I really cant stand that record...........my nightmare would be a U2 cover of it.

also in the same vein Mickie Champion - What good am I (without you)

arghhhhhhhhhhh its stuck in my head now!

What! somebody else doesn't rate Bobby Kline? Awful, dross, dancer-unfriendly kak Steve. On a par with Mr Soul and Bobby f******n Sheen!!

(Bobby Kline is) Absolute barrel scraping nonsense, it's another one with a hideous tune and crap lyrics and the Mike Sammes Singers doing backing vocals. Agree with Mr Soul as well. Awful.

Edited September 6, 200618 yr by Pete-S

My answer is in the title,6 by 6.............worst record ever,and the vocals ive heard make it worser.........

sorry andy my old mucker but

CITY LIGHTS....WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP.

i hate this record more than jehovah witnesses knocking on christmas day!

NOW THIS BOY DOES KNOW A BAD RECORD WHEN HE HEARS ONE

CITY LIGHTS - JERRY NAYLOR ... Oh Dear Terrible record

Heres another idea for James Coit

I really can't stress how friggin' easy this is. Set oven temperature of 200F.

Put a bowl upside-down on a cookie sheet, whack the record on top, and set it in the oven for about five minutes.

Pull it out (use a hotpad or you'll burn yourself!), whip off the flimsy record, and shove it down inside another bowl to mold it.

They don't give off toxic fumes or anything, and they don't get melty enough that you see fingerprints.

You've only got a few seconds to work with it though, so be quick.

I think I'm going to glue some marbles to the bottom to act as legs and use a piece of tape to cover up the hole.

Voila! Ultra trendy potato chip bowls

What a brilliant idea

Wouldn't use "James Coit", still love it, but you could use some old pop records & stick on some photo copied lables of rare tunes !

I suppose you could apply it to all sorts of records, be great for pubs & clubs.

Take the idea to the "Dragons Den", you could be a Mill'yunair by Christmas

going to say just 1.. i never liked reparata and the delrons - panic..

anita

My answer is in the title,6 by 6.............worst record ever,and the vocals ive heard make it worser.........

Hi Ken,is there a Motown,version with Vocals, I thought it was a myth, or do you mean that Lavine Crap

Bazza

Don't think any really make me feel that bad, but 6 that i never really took to are :

Footse, the thread running about it now brought bad memories of that one, but like some of the other records mentioned i don't really class it as Northern soul anyway.

Narbay - Belive it or not -

Velours - I'm Gonna' Change - Should like it really has it has all the ingredients of the Oldie sound that i prefer, but it just never jelled with me.

Baja Marimba Band - Along Comes Mary - yuk

Barbara McNair - You're Gonna Love My Baby - Again, i wouldn't say i dislike it with a vengence, but i just never found it as thrilling as most others did. Just think it takes an awful long time to get going.

Don Thomas - Come On Train - Yet again don't hate it, but it was such a popular sound but did nothing for me.

So in summing up, i suppose Baja Marimba Band is the only one i really dislike

:angry: :angry: Margaret Little :angry: :angry:

rare shit - imho !!!!!!

Edited September 8, 200618 yr by shute

just can't stand that 'two flights up third window from the right'

don't know who did it, but think it was the pub singer from down my local,

worst thing i have ever heard, and cant quite work out how it snuk onto the northern scene