The Ridiculous Sound Of A Grown Man

[Guest Dan]

almost literally cacking myself as am doing a guest dj spot at soulsville tomorrow night

have only djd twice in past 15 years, both times at joey dunlop's caergwle soul nights where basically made a fool of myself

spent all last night trying to decide what records would sound least bad and wishing i had never criticised proper djs for playing oldies.

anyway, few sits vac

looking for:

1) 1 dj's gimp

must be willing to carry my records in (i'll be bringing six 400-count boxes), and generally minister to all my needs. must be happy to hang around near me and help out if i forget record titles etc. ability to handle oneself in tight spot an advantage - it could get a bit tasty if (actually, when) i piss all those yorkshire nutjobs off

2) 4 dj's groupies

must be willing to dance to all my records, clap loudly and come up to decks to shake my hand in rotation.

in big gaps while waiting for music to start due to shit cueing-up, would like them to say loudly to each other things like 'i hope he plays that unreleased magnetics thing' or 'he should never have sold that box of acetates to butch'.

3) 1 dj mentor

would like an experienced dj to give me a bell over the next 24 hours and talk me through a few stock phrases

eg

'this was big for me in 1980 so-and-so...'

'right, now, on with the requested sound of such-and-such...'

'you what? you're having a fucking laugh if you think that's a bootleg mate'

other good phrases much appreciated. dead air is a crime.

4) 1 cover-up advisor

regrettably i haven't got anything 'shit rare'.

however i have got a few things that are just 'shit'. so they may never have been played anywhere.

struggling for group names...how do the following sound:

dave joiner and the mad bastards (nice group sound, slightly discordant harmonies, lyrics a bit weird...can actually hear the orderlies at one point)

christian and the white soul brothers (nice beach sound...vocals actually by val doonican)

the pete smith experience (nice 70s)

5) 1 controversy generator

could some lanky twat from london secretly come up and record my set?

this would give the impression that i had some sounds worth recording, which would be useful. always good to get a bit of a buzz going.

6) reviewer

must be deaf. review must include the phrases 'dan really should get more gigs', 'put pat brady right in his place' and 'where has this genius been hiding?'. 'saviour of the rare soul scene' would be nice if could be slipped in somewhere too.

thanks

very nervous dan

[Supercorsa]

almost literally cacking myself as am doing a guest dj spot at soulsville tomorrow

3) 1 dj mentor

would like an experienced dj to give me a bell over the next 24 hours and talk me through a few stock phrases

eg

'this was big for me in 1980 so-and-so...'

'right, now, on with the requested sound of such-and-such...'

'you what? you're having a fucking laugh if you think that's a bootleg mate'

other good phrases much appreciated. dead air is a crime.

thanks

very nervous dan

link

You could ask Jamie for advice, but then again he's no expert!

[pikeys dog]

Dan, I will be there to laugh and jeer...

I'll be delivering your CD to you, but beware, if you are crap you might receive it 'edge on'

Not putting any pressure on you, like.

[Guest]

almost literally cacking myself as am doing a guest dj spot at soulsville tomorrow night

have only djd twice in past 15 years, both times at joey dunlop's caergwle soul nights where basically made a fool of myself

spent all last night trying to decide what records would sound least bad and wishing i had never criticised proper djs for playing oldies.

anyway, few sits vac

looking for:

1) 1 dj's gimp

must be willing to carry my records in (i'll be bringing six 400-count boxes), and generally minister to all my needs. must be happy to hang around near me and help out if i forget record titles etc. ability to handle oneself in tight spot an advantage - it could get a bit tasty if (actually, when) i piss all those yorkshire nutjobs off

2) 4 dj's groupies

must be willing to dance to all my records, clap loudly and come up to decks to shake my hand in rotation.

in big gaps while waiting for music to start due to shit cueing-up, would like them to say loudly to each other things like 'i hope he plays that unreleased magnetics thing' or 'he should never have sold that box of acetates to butch'.

3) 1 dj mentor

would like an experienced dj to give me a bell over the next 24 hours and talk me through a few stock phrases

eg

'this was big for me in 1980 so-and-so...'

'right, now, on with the requested sound of such-and-such...'

'you what? you're having a fucking laugh if you think that's a bootleg mate'

other good phrases much appreciated. dead air is a crime.

4) 1 cover-up advisor

regrettably i haven't got anything 'shit rare'.

however i have got a few things that are just 'shit'. so they may never have been played anywhere.

struggling for group names...how do the following sound:

dave joiner and the mad bastards (nice group sound, slightly discordant harmonies, lyrics a bit weird...can actually hear the orderlies at one point)

christian and the white soul brothers (nice beach sound...vocals actually by val doonican)

the pete smith experience (nice 70s)

5) 1 controversy generator

could some lanky twat from london secretly come up and record my set?

this would give the impression that i had some sounds worth recording, which would be useful. always good to get a bit of a buzz going.

6) reviewer

must be deaf. review must include the phrases 'dan really should get more gigs', 'put pat brady right in his place' and 'where has this genius been hiding?'. 'saviour of the rare soul scene' would be nice if could be slipped in somewhere too.

thanks

very nervous dan

link

great cover up names

Will be there egging Pikeys Dog on Dan.

They watch at Soulsville, so if nobody goes near the decks, they will laugh if you clear the floor with a so called ' request '

The Snake, Out on the Floor and the Four Vandals always go down well there, although you may get a better reaction with say, err Virginia Blakely on Mojo ? (if you have it )

BTW, its Leeds, so there will be no shortage of people to be your gimp (own mask supplied)

See you there

Steve

Edited June 2, 2005 by BLADEFORLIFE

[Guest dodger]

almost literally cacking myself as am doing a guest dj spot at soulsville tomorrow night

have only djd twice in past 15 years, both times at joey dunlop's caergwle soul nights where basically made a fool of myself

spent all last night trying to decide what records would sound least bad and wishing i had never criticised proper djs for playing oldies.

anyway, few sits vac

looking for:

1) 1 dj's gimp

must be willing to carry my records in (i'll be bringing six 400-count boxes), and generally minister to all my needs. must be happy to hang around near me and help out if i forget record titles etc. ability to handle oneself in tight spot an advantage - it could get a bit tasty if (actually, when) i piss all those yorkshire nutjobs off

2) 4 dj's groupies

must be willing to dance to all my records, clap loudly and come up to decks to shake my hand in rotation.

in big gaps while waiting for music to start due to shit cueing-up, would like them to say loudly to each other things like 'i hope he plays that unreleased magnetics thing' or 'he should never have sold that box of acetates to butch'.

3) 1 dj mentor

would like an experienced dj to give me a bell over the next 24 hours and talk me through a few stock phrases

eg

'this was big for me in 1980 so-and-so...'

'right, now, on with the requested sound of such-and-such...'

'you what? you're having a fucking laugh if you think that's a bootleg mate'

other good phrases much appreciated. dead air is a crime.

4) 1 cover-up advisor

regrettably i haven't got anything 'shit rare'.

however i have got a few things that are just 'shit'. so they may never have been played anywhere.

struggling for group names...how do the following sound:

dave joiner and the mad bastards (nice group sound, slightly discordant harmonies, lyrics a bit weird...can actually hear the orderlies at one point)

christian and the white soul brothers (nice beach sound...vocals actually by val doonican)

the pete smith experience (nice 70s)

5) 1 controversy generator

could some lanky twat from london secretly come up and record my set?

this would give the impression that i had some sounds worth recording, which would be useful. always good to get a bit of a buzz going.

6) reviewer

must be deaf. review must include the phrases 'dan really should get more gigs', 'put pat brady right in his place' and 'where has this genius been hiding?'. 'saviour of the rare soul scene' would be nice if could be slipped in somewhere too.

thanks

very nervous dan

link

'Dead air is a crime'. Partridge ROCKS!!

[Ady Potts]

almost literally cacking myself as am doing a guest dj spot at soulsville tomorrow night

have only djd twice in past 15 years, both times at joey dunlop's caergwle soul nights where basically made a fool of myself

spent all last night trying to decide what records would sound least bad and wishing i had never criticised proper djs for playing oldies.

anyway, few sits vac

looking for:

1) 1 dj's gimp

must be willing to carry my records in (i'll be bringing six 400-count boxes), and generally minister to all my needs. must be happy to hang around near me and help out if i forget record titles etc. ability to handle oneself in tight spot an advantage - it could get a bit tasty if (actually, when) i piss all those yorkshire nutjobs off

2) 4 dj's groupies

must be willing to dance to all my records, clap loudly and come up to decks to shake my hand in rotation.

in big gaps while waiting for music to start due to shit cueing-up, would like them to say loudly to each other things like 'i hope he plays that unreleased magnetics thing' or 'he should never have sold that box of acetates to butch'.

3) 1 dj mentor

would like an experienced dj to give me a bell over the next 24 hours and talk me through a few stock phrases

eg

'this was big for me in 1980 so-and-so...'

'right, now, on with the requested sound of such-and-such...'

'you what? you're having a fucking laugh if you think that's a bootleg mate'

other good phrases much appreciated. dead air is a crime.

4) 1 cover-up advisor

regrettably i haven't got anything 'shit rare'.

however i have got a few things that are just 'shit'. so they may never have been played anywhere.

struggling for group names...how do the following sound:

dave joiner and the mad bastards (nice group sound, slightly discordant harmonies, lyrics a bit weird...can actually hear the orderlies at one point)

christian and the white soul brothers (nice beach sound...vocals actually by val doonican)

the pete smith experience (nice 70s)

5) 1 controversy generator

could some lanky twat from london secretly come up and record my set?

this would give the impression that i had some sounds worth recording, which would be useful. always good to get a bit of a buzz going.

6) reviewer

must be deaf. review must include the phrases 'dan really should get more gigs', 'put pat brady right in his place' and 'where has this genius been hiding?'. 'saviour of the rare soul scene' would be nice if could be slipped in somewhere too.

thanks

very nervous dan

link

Good luck Dan!!

Ahem...I think he'll need it