I HEAR SO MANY PEOPLE WHO ARE AT THEIR WITS END , AND I UNDERSTAND ITS THEIR VIEW.
But for me its great, i'm enjoying it like when i was a young man!!
I had a major epiphany type moment at my first Prestatyn(well any weekender), went there in a state of unease, but left realising my state of mind regarding how people saw me was wrong, my friends were always there, i was just unapproachable due to my lack of esteem.
It was great i went home for once quite liking myself, and ever since my whole self portrayal, and different appearance has meant i now make new friends, and old ones who i avoided can talk to me, and me them, and its great.
Got my music back where it was, dance more than ever, use things in the right way, to enjoy myself, and that was my biggest step from my big 'ole.
I am getting married this year, still amazes me too! not even i wanted to be with me for yonks!...Sandi has been the new crutch to go under the opposite arm-pit to the Smokey one that kept me just about above the gutter for so long....love 'em both , but in different ways LOL.
Collecting records, even had the odd spots, that however now seems to have dried up, but so what, can play at home, and get to avoid the politic etc.......
Did do all the local do's and nighters for a while, but now simply cherry pick events....still only maybe 200 real hardcore nighter people, with 30 plus years of growing with the music, and i choose to go to the events that cater for us.I see two distinct scenes, the hectic social, popular events, fair play they love it, i go occasionally to catch up with people, but avoid any musical expectations, and at times get the odd suprise...keep it going you lot!
Yes our crowd has less people, still weekly venues, and a few that now want to go with the top line up, Lifeline was a beacon, now there is a bit of Lifeline everywhere, i cant do it every week financially, and there are old mates who at times gripe, we dont support them, sorry its not personal, we are broke assed mothers!
And thats my scene, if i had the cash, kids have flown the nest, and im usually up all weekend anyway, i'd be there every time...its great!!....however Sandi is not up for that, so she is my saftey valve i suppose, but i still have a blow out when ever im out, its been my lifelong hobby, won't stop now, not now im finally getting the full scene experience, in high definition.
Not interested anymore what people say, or think, batled that for 25 years, f--k 'em, just keep on keeping on, do what you feel, let the worrying, gossipy folks get on with it, bet they aint even got it right anyway, i know exactly what ive been, and what i am thinking, hee hee hee!!!!!!!
Its great, still see loads of people who cannot hide their pleasure in the scene, dancers, record people, or theose of us fully engaged in mind and body in the joys of this fantastic scene we inhabit....its a unique experience, that for a time i forgot is our home, our comfort zone, and where we belong....and i aint going one step back towards that hole, its great!!
We have to accept diversification was our mistake, not once, twice, or single figure times, oh! for the days of one room, one music SOUL, and the chance for everyone to get an ear for what was always a scene based on new music, that coulnt last for ever just give me good music...aint that what its all about, and if you can go home in the morning having heard a fair percentage of what you like, then who can complain....every fuc--r it sounds like at times!!!...come on get yourselves back on line....i dont want to be out on my own, but at least then i might get a spot or two.
Politics...why would anyone who lived through the result of MThatcher, and the destruction of our welfare state and industries ever wanna go there again....oops better get off my soapbox, even my lot aint socialists these days, leave em to it...we've got bigger heads to fry!!!
I HEAR SO MANY PEOPLE WHO ARE AT THEIR WITS END , AND I UNDERSTAND ITS THEIR VIEW.
But for me its great, i'm enjoying it like when i was a young man!!
I had a major epiphany type moment at my first Prestatyn(well any weekender), went there in a state of unease, but left realising my state of mind regarding how people saw me was wrong, my friends were always there, i was just unapproachable due to my lack of esteem.
It was great i went home for once quite liking myself, and ever since my whole self portrayal, and different appearance has meant i now make new friends, and old ones who i avoided can talk to me, and me them, and its great.
Got my music back where it was, dance more than ever, use things in the right way, to enjoy myself, and that was my biggest step from my big 'ole.
I am getting married this year, still amazes me too! not even i wanted to be with me for yonks!...Sandi has been the new crutch to go under the opposite arm-pit to the Smokey one that kept me just about above the gutter for so long....love 'em both , but in different ways LOL.
Collecting records, even had the odd spots, that however now seems to have dried up, but so what, can play at home, and get to avoid the politic etc.......
Did do all the local do's and nighters for a while, but now simply cherry pick events....still only maybe 200 real hardcore nighter people, with 30 plus years of growing with the music, and i choose to go to the events that cater for us.I see two distinct scenes, the hectic social, popular events, fair play they love it, i go occasionally to catch up with people, but avoid any musical expectations, and at times get the odd suprise...keep it going you lot!
Yes our crowd has less people, still weekly venues, and a few that now want to go with the top line up, Lifeline was a beacon, now there is a bit of Lifeline everywhere, i cant do it every week financially, and there are old mates who at times gripe, we dont support them, sorry its not personal, we are broke assed mothers!
And thats my scene, if i had the cash, kids have flown the nest, and im usually up all weekend anyway, i'd be there every time...its great!!....however Sandi is not up for that, so she is my saftey valve i suppose, but i still have a blow out when ever im out, its been my lifelong hobby, won't stop now, not now im finally getting the full scene experience, in high definition.
Not interested anymore what people say, or think, batled that for 25 years, f--k 'em, just keep on keeping on, do what you feel, let the worrying, gossipy folks get on with it, bet they aint even got it right anyway, i know exactly what ive been, and what i am thinking, hee hee hee!!!!!!!
Its great, still see loads of people who cannot hide their pleasure in the scene, dancers, record people, or theose of us fully engaged in mind and body in the joys of this fantastic scene we inhabit....its a unique experience, that for a time i forgot is our home, our comfort zone, and where we belong....and i aint going one step back towards that hole, its great!!
We have to accept diversification was our mistake, not once, twice, or single figure times, oh! for the days of one room, one music SOUL, and the chance for everyone to get an ear for what was always a scene based on new music, that coulnt last for ever just give me good music...aint that what its all about, and if you can go home in the morning having heard a fair percentage of what you like, then who can complain....every fuc--r it sounds like at times!!!...come on get yourselves back on line....i dont want to be out on my own, but at least then i might get a spot or two.
Politics...why would anyone who lived through the result of MThatcher, and the destruction of our welfare state and industries ever wanna go there again....oops better get off my soapbox, even my lot aint socialists these days, leave em to it...we've got bigger heads to fry!!!
LOVIN' IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!! HARPO XX