We won't need a map

Can you play The Snake?

We don't need to get there early; it's not as if we will be locked out

Got a right barging on this; it's the original label as well!

Are you sure you want to come love? You'll not stay awake

I will stay awake, I wont spoil it for you

Northernsoul is dead

This venue will last forever!

There are loads of tickets left

"The dancefloor is like woman to me, u got to find the best spots, and once u find it stay there" Billy Whiz 2009

Any others?

Watch this spin................. whoops..... sorry ..... I'll get some more drinks

Does this shirt make me look fat?

These baggys are gonna make me look ace!

Look, I am not going to spill my drink!

I wonder if I can still do the splits........... fookin ell! Help!!

Best one I remember....'It's just a feeling'-Jackie Green na Mrs Bicknell circa 1988

Kev

Watch this spin................. whoops..... sorry ..... I'll get some more drinks

Does this shirt make me look fat?

These baggys are gonna make me look ace!

Look, I am not going to spill my drink!

I wonder if I can still do the splits........... fookin ell! Help!!

You cannot seriously tell me that this has been played out! It's the sort of stuff me mam and dad listened to in the 50's.

[Tennesee Ernie Ford - Sixteen Tons]

2 more from me that always make me laugh

'I don't collect albums'

'I didn't know that was on the other side'

" I USED TO HAVE THIS ".....upon hearing a said tune being played.

" ONLY COST ME A FIVER "..... " dito "

" DINNAE BELIEVE HES STILL PLAYIN THAT SH++E "..... " dito "

" IT`S A PRESSING " ....... " dito "

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by Dennisoul

HEARING A NEW TUNE IS LIKE GETTING INTO A VIRGINS KNICKERS

A BIT DIFFICULT AT FIRST , BUT WELL WORTH THE EFFORT.

REV SWAMMPY QUOTE

i dont know the last time i heard that-about a record thats just finished?

One of me mates while at a Gig in Italy.

" Got any Spagetamin Mate? "

I laughed the whole feckin weeked

Sorry just had to share that with you.

Back to topic - Coat Got Gone.

just looking at gavins icon reminded me of "did you go to wigan?"

one i find really getting on my nerves lately is "have you got duffy?"

"did you go to wigan?"

THIS SEVENTIES STUFF WILL NEVER CATCH ON.

'I 'ad It when you were still shittin yellow yoof!' Rob Marriotts answer when someone showed him a record and asked him if he had heard it

These f*cking bogs stink

have you got any tackle

He's f*cked off--how we getting home now

Oh and had this last night . 'Hey up youth, can you remember, that time we went the Mecca and...............(insert any adventure here)

And you have no idea wtf he's on about --but just vaguely agree with him

'Had it in '74 mate'

'It was crap the first time around'

'Used to be a Soul Pack record'

'Bought it off Anderson for a quid'

'£700 for Lee Fields? Wouldn't give ya £7 for it'!

All © I. Dewhirst 2009

Ian D

its at home,in me other box.

'have yer got any money on ya--- need some batteries for the Discotron

Just enough for bus fare mate

Its only worth 3 but he wants a fiver

I haven't got enough get in ( and you've just travelled 80 miles to the venue and he

not said anything before )

just enough for a tenners worth

He's f*cked off--how we getting home now

now that made me laugh.. remember when i went to a doo with a mate of mine he drove us their and he fooked off to a niter somewhere. I was stranded managed to get a lift home eventually.

chris

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by ChrisOD1964

Lets all meet at Keele services

Watch this spin................. whoops..... sorry ..... I'll get some more drinks

Reminds me of me

Fook me --she looks well now--she ws f*cking bosted at school

'Played at Stafford' mumbled after every other record, while nodding sagely...

'Wigan oldie' mumbled after every other record, while nodding sagely...

"Only 2 known copies"

Yeah right, Butch, Sam, Arthur, Ginger & Andy Dyson are playing it.....

Watch this spin................. whoops..... sorry ..... I'll get some more drinks

Reminds me of me

Now havent we all done that

chris

Anyone used these ?

No honest love ... I'll be home by 2

And .. 2 seconds after shaking someones hand

What was his name again ?

And finally ...

Yeah .. I'll definately fall asleep when I get home !!

translated and condensed from numerous 'Quotes' that all amount to the same thing.

All other venues within a 50 mile radius of ours are shi*t

" oh yes i love this tune gotta dance" away onto the dance floor you go and straight back off you come "not what i thought it was"

chris

RON PEDLEY [YORK] when offered ROBBIE LAWSON for £25, "ITS JUST BEEN BOOTED, THERE GONNA TURN UP BY THE BOX LOAD"

'hey up mate ,haven't seen you for ages--How long have you been into Northern'

That bast8rd never went the Torch..

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by jez jones

OUR SOUL NIGHT/NIGHTER WILL BE PLAYING UNKNOWNS

Lets fcuk off this music's shite!

Usually heard at weekenders

'i wish I hadn't drunk so much this afternoon----i've missed half the f*cking night now '

'What's the Modern room like'

IM NOT A DJ IM A RECORD COLLECTOR

DID YOU GO THE CASINO

Ive been before,

Bollox,Ive missed the turning,

Iam sure its around here,

Bollox its there,

Where is the Twat,(Standing out side a venue,on a cold morning)

Do you want your coat(mis heard as, do you want a coke) No ive got one here

F,ing Sat Nav.

Kev

Derbyshire banter going to a Nighter.

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by good angel

where's the modern room!

THIS IS GONNAE BE FUCKIN MASSIVE-keb darge circa 1984

you got me, guy hennigan, with without doubt the best in 60s soul around at the moment-guy hennigan circa 1984

Lots of toilet related ones...

"why won't this bleedin silver paper flush ffs..."

"where's the seat?!"

"I hope that's water i've just walked through..."

"Damn the hand towels have ran out... i suppose those on top of the bin aren't too dirty to use..."

and the classic..

"sod buying water i'll just drink from the taps..."

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by Matt Male

"What £10.00 for a fuxxing niter ... It'll never happen !"

"What £10.00 for a fuxxing niter ... It'll never happen !"

In the same vane

HOW MUCH BUT ITS 3AM AND WE,VE BEEN TO ANOTHER CLUB FIRST

experienced niter door staffs trained response

well f*** off back there

or

ok just for you the rest of the djs and staff are gonna work for half their wages for the rest of the nite.

Edited January 17, 200916 yr by Soultown andy

great sets played by all the dj's......posted the next day by someone who told YOU on the night the music is shyte

heres one l heard at a nameless nighter a year or so ago......bouncer comes in the toilet,picks up some of those little plastic bags you see on the floor and says....."wish they'd chuck their drug packets out the window"

As told to me once "an allnighter without speed is like dipping your wick without cumming"

" whats the floor like "

chris

Ive just sold that.......

I sold that last year ........

Got rid of that a while back ........

Not keen on that ...... (but they then start looking for it) priceless !!

Best one " WAKE UP" to the driver, as you are being driven home the next morning.......... aaaaargh

Has your legs fell asleep ......... mine have

Are we nearly there.........

Did you go to Wigan .....

Lots of toilet related ones...

and the classic..

"sod buying water i'll just drink from the taps..."

this brings back memories from the poverty stricken 70's! oops! back we go again! just shut up 'n git yer heed under the tap!

Having driven up to Sheriden's with back door Kenny leaving my coat and a load of records in the boot of his car.

Next morning.....

....'Where's the car Ken?'

....'Swopped it for this album and that old banger!'

Woops!

Kev

Edited January 18, 200916 yr by Kev Moore

No more gear? Blimey we'll have to lick out some old bags

"can i borrow a pen"......and my all time favorite......."guaranteed five wank powder ..mate"...(sorry mum)....

"it's the best i've ever had, watch what your doing"

"i was barbed up once"....said to me by a regular on the site no names ONCE! say i, i didn't mean it like that he replied....he'll know who i mean, and smile as he made me at the time.

"first ever play for this one" is that tonight ??

"c/u as" .......................... (why it was never covered at the Cats'Torch where you first heard it)

"I'm not saying anything. its just that my copy was different, it was styrene and had a matrix"

"I once bought a Lenny Curtis for £5" i said to a dealer.."was that what it was worth" says he..."no you cheeky bastard" i reply"(didn't tell him i prob sold it for a tenner too)

"No mick i dont want that Cashmeres for £20, it's played out" me to mick holdsworth 1980

" oh yes i love this tune gotta dance" away onto the dance floor you go and straight back off you come "not what i thought it was"

chris

god l think we've all done that, but if you don't want to look like a prize pratt you dance to the record and make like you know it