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Djing Cock Ups


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Lets be honest, most of us are record collectors first and dj's very much second! Some guys have a natural talent for djing and always sound professional

(my old mate Hippo from Cheltenham for one).

Every allnighter at Yate included at least one train crash behind the decks from me. But thanks to the aforementioned substance abuse (which was generally the cause), not many knew or cared!

Thanks Dave, but believe me, I've made all these mistakes myself, they still happen if I get a later spot...:-)

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Got booked to do a place called Ampersand in Manc (Soulful House) and had just started using a digital vinyl thingy called Traktor - wired it in after checking it worked before kick off about six times - sound.

 

My set came round - would it work? would it heck :elvis:

 

I hurriedly ruffled through the other jocks bags looking for anything I would play - nowt.

 

I played an hour and three quarter set with the nine 12" singles I'd took with me....remember, vinyl never fails you. :wink:

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Guest MissHongkongfuey

Although it wasn't a soul do, this really was a DJ f**k up....

Other Arf was DJing a birthday do and was asked... "Do You have any Pat Kelly?". His reply was "Sorry Mate, I've got no Irish.Your Mum just asked me for the same"!!!

"F**k off you Prick...That's my wife"!!

 

He now collects reggae and loves Pat Kelly but I doubt he'll ever be asked back

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Its not the mistake its what you do about it: the legendry Mr. Curtis one Tuesday night at the truly great Berlin club in Manchester, once turned the track down to anounce that he didn't know why people are dancing because he'd put the wrong track on. Class. I've made every mistake listed here but a memorable one was Saturday night in the Hacie putting on the wrong track from the JOB Orchestra LP. It started uptempo thus no problem then broke down into a virtuallly accapella 'hari kristna' chant. I brazened it out...After all it was the Hacie.

dean

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DJING AT A DOUBLE WEDDING ( 2 SISTERS) QUITE A FEW YEARS AGO PUT ON SHOTGUN WEDDING FOR A LAUGH FOUND OUT BOTH BRIDES WERE UP THE DUFF

THERE DAD WENT NUTS I COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING.  NEVER GOT TO DO THE CHRISTENING PARTY

Edited by mickjay33
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were you tempted to follow up with a  "Lets be havin' ya!!"  ?  :lol:   

 

:D  Noooo........that line is already taken and used by Mr. Chapman (used well imho)

 

Don't know exactly what came over me, must have been the excitement of spinning tunes at was a legendary venue, one of the best nighters there has been.

 

dazz

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DJing at Cheltenham one night , just about to begin my set and opened my record box upside down , with the result that 200 records landed upside down in the lid .....The guy just finishing his set said " I better play one more while you sort yourself out " ....total chaos but funny now I remember it .....

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DJing at Cheltenham one night , just about to begin my set and opened my record box upside down , with the result that 200 records landed upside down in the lid .....The guy just finishing his set said " I better play one more while you sort yourself out " ....total chaos but funny now I remember it .....

Ouch!!!

A friend of mine who I won't name turned up at one of our nights with all his 12" singles & albums in 2 carrier bags.

Well you can work the rest out for yourselves...

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posted this before on another thread ,I was D J ing for Steve Lyons in Bournemouth , a week before I asked what time I was on "what time do you wanna be on " as late as possible ,I replied ...........BIG MISTAKE ! pissed as a f*rt i was , and as it`s always dark behind Steve`s  decks, I had my torch , which I couldn`t get to work .It was 20 minutes into my set before someone said " he`s talking into the fookin torch .  I Wondered why my torch didn`t work  :g:

 

WiganBrian . 

:lol:

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Another one is thanking the dj who'se been on before you and getting their name wrong :lol:

 

He he - Years back at The Embankment Club, 'a very drunk' Dave Vanner followed Paul Donnelly........slurred into the mike......"Thanks to......"......then he actually turned around to face Paul who was putting his records away behind him, still speaking into the mike (as if he was 'havin' a chat')......."what's ya name again mate?"......Everyone absolutely howled! - It was fantastic! :lol:

 

Me? - I'm sure I must have made a mistake once.......... :D 

 

All the best,

 

Len :thumbsup: 

Edited by LEN
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Am I the only one who cues up a record and then decides to take it off and replace it with another at the back of the box halfway through.....but takes an age in finding it only to look round and find theres only four revolutions left on the record playing....cue sticking it on and a hail Mary before the arm hits the edge of the beginning of the styrene like a Led Zeppelin divebombing.Ive now taken up the Ginger Taylor technique of cueing.....sod headphones.Aim it above the first turn....mike on for waffle then arm down and we are off.

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Guest sharmo 1

You lot ain't lived let me give you the most unnerving story about a dj just about to do a gig at a wedding.Our late great chum Mr. Derek Allan did a good turn for his friend taking is idiot son with him to get him out the house. Derek didn't like this lad but Derek would help anyone .All the equipment is set up and Derek's playing a few 45's when the Father of the bride say's that he wants the music to carry on whilst the buffet is being served and if Derek or the delinquent wanted anything they could have something before everyone else , Derek was on a strict diet because of his heart problem but told the lad to go and help himself.Here it comes chaps , Derek looked up across the dance floor and saw this stupid bastard walking across the dance floor with a piece of wedding cake only problem was the Bride hadn't cut it yet !!!!!!!.Luckily it was taken in a nice way but Derek never took said idiot again , how would you feel about that one if it happened to you just before your set ? best regards Rita,

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Guest SteveJohnston

You lot ain't lived let me give you the most unnerving story about a dj just about to do a gig at a wedding.Our late great chum Mr. Derek Allan did a good turn for his friend taking is idiot son with him to get him out the house. Derek didn't like this lad but Derek would help anyone .All the equipment is set up and Derek's playing a few 45's when the Father of the bride say's that he wants the music to carry on whilst the buffet is being served and if Derek or the delinquent wanted anything they could have something before everyone else , Derek was on a strict diet because of his heart problem but told the lad to go and help himself.Here it comes chaps , Derek looked up across the dance floor and saw this stupid bastard walking across the dance floor with a piece of wedding cake only problem was the Bride hadn't cut it yet !!!!!!!.Luckily it was taken in a nice way but Derek never took said idiot again , how would you feel about that one if it happened to you just before your set ? best regards Rita,

That's when a record box should have a shovel attached! ......... Then you could hit the idiot with it!!

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Guest ScooterNik

Not quite the cock-up-behind-the-decks type thing, but I got a scooter club booking. Wrote down the details, then on the Friday I sorted out a couple of boxes and loaded the car for the Saturday nights shenanigans. I was just heading out of the house at about 7.30 to have my usual Friday night meet up with the mates when the phone rings.

 

"Hi Nik, what time are you getting here?"

"Eh?"

"You've not forgotten you're DJing tonight?"

Hurridly check the details, swear, leap in the car and nail it 80 miles up the road, getting there five minutes before it's due to start.... Between six of us, we had the rig up and running in 15 minutes.

 

Did I learn the lesson? No. Two years later, the same club asked me again. The year in the middle it had been a Saturday and I'd not been able to make it. This year I assumed the same and then got the same phone call, this time an hour earlier 'Coz we remembered what you did last time'. Didn't do that gig again..... :D

 

 

 

 

Done all the others at one time or another, and have also been holding a mic when a drunk got alcohol all over the decks, sending it live, and 240 volts up my arm!

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one time i was DJ-ing and the music coming out of one of the tables started to sound terrible (weak and distorted - BADLY). i checked and rechecked everything and was mortified. turned out the locking "collar" that holds the cartridge to the tonearm started to come loose and the connections inside were not touching correctly. totally knackered the set. i hate technology!

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I remember DJing for the North East Soul Club in the 70s and turned up one night and the promoter/ DJ Alex had developed a way of setting the records without using record middles - so he hadn't brought any. I spent the whole set trying to centre the records so they played properly ( and wasn't entirely sucessful). On the rare occasions I do a spot these days I always take middles with me - just in case. 

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Remember one Wilton allnighter when Gaz kellett was djing then followed by Bob Hinsley.  Bob (very professional DJ IMHO) cued the record, spoke to thank Gaz then the needle just skated over the vinyl !

It took a while for Bob to get the "Fluff" off the needle.....

 

Louis

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Guest in town Mikey

This guy Lennie (Not Len) was Djing in Kirby. At a wedding reception.

A fella came up and requested Yvonne Fair - It Should Have Been Me.

Turns out he wasnt the groom and he got the bride pregnant.

It all kicked off big style.

 

Mind you DJing at weddings is a night mare. DJing in Kirby is a no no. Djing at a wedding reception in Kirby is a bl@@dy disaster.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apologies. Its got to be ten years since I last saw Coast to coast.

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Mind you DJing at weddings is a night mare.

Ha! Deejayed at a wedding last night, had to wire up the decks and plug into the mixing desk. Unplugged the iPod, and plugged in the decks. Few people were up dancing and I thought it was sounding absolutely rotten. Frantically checked the mixing desk and couldn't believe that the channel I'd plugged into had a button switched on. The button? The "vocal eliminator" button...

I thought in 25 years I'd made every mistake, but good to see there's still fresh ones.

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DJing for many years and lots of cock ups along the way but this one sticks in my mind. I was DJing with a mate of mine Frank Swindles and after about an hour I kept hearing the odd hissing sound, this became more often and we were worried the decks were about to blow as we had tried everything, messing about with the amp settings then the volume and changing needles etc much to the annoyance of the crowd. It turned out to be a tart sat at the table next to the decks who had the loudest lisp you could imagine, we never stopped laughing all night after that.

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...in defence of us 'amateurs' exposing our misfortunes...I offer this to those 'techies'!x

 

St Ives A/N...re-launch '95. We came from the Maltings which held 350 'officially'.....and so I decided we needed bigger kit for the St Ivo venue with a hopeful 1,000 to kick it off!

Brought in a now good friend upon recommendation! He came with big lorry 8pm...2 hours to go....4 helpers.....and asked me to stay outta the way as they set up on the stage! £400 worth of 'support' and it looked impressive! As back in the day.....a queue was forming outside our very first St Ives.......and we were due to open the doors at 10pm....yet no sound had come from the stage since the techies arrival with half hour to go! I wandered in.....leant against the stage arms folded head resting on them..........'any luck yet Chris?'....sez I innocently.......him sweating profusely....his lads running around checking stuff........he shouted...SOOTY I'M ON IT OK...???!!!!'.....and so left again to wander to the doors and wave confidently at friends in the queue....9.50pm..........not giving away any worry....kept smiling! 9.58.......go back to the stage......lean against it in standard non intimidating pose......Chris next to tears now.....silence......and I allowed myself a quick bury of my head into me arms.......as I did so.....I looked down and saw a socket on the front stage wall.....it had a plug in it.......coming from the stage! It was off........so I switched it on........and a warm...deep...re-assuring humm echoed around the room as the deck lights flickered on Chris's soaked forehead......!!! Chris looked up from the deck.........asked 'WTF DID U DOOOO???'.....I said....'turned the mains on'.....! Doors opened....1146 Soulies poured in.....and I never lost a drop of sweat before 10pm.........I managed my 'stress' and danced looooads off afterwards in relief....! Techies.....pah!!!hehe!x

 

@@
~
LUV
SOOTY
X

 

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Edited by SOOTY
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We`ve all made balls-ups, its all a part of the game.

Recently at one soul night and not mentioning any names :shhh:  DJ caught the effects button on the mixer and played one and a half tracks with a very heavy dose of flange.

The faces on the dancers said it all.  :lol:

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:D  Noooo........that line is already taken and used by Mr. Chapman (used well imho)

 

Don't know exactly what came over me, must have been the excitement of spinning tunes at was a legendary venue, one of the best nighters there has been.

 

dazz

And ask Sean where & who he first heard use it.........

 

Russ

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And ask Sean where & who he first heard use it.........

 

Russ

 

I think we all heard mate - Crikey! :D 

 

.......It worked though :wink:

 

All the best,

 

Len :thumbsup: 

 

P.s - A bit of poetic licence there mate, not really sure where Sean actually first heard it :wink: 

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Hope your well Len....Colony Club, Uptown Down South Nighters....

 

Best Russ

 

I was there! ...and have heard your booming (enthusiastic) D.J voice many times since.....also playing some lovely Mid-tempo tunz along the way mate.....what was that one we were trying to remember outside Life-line? - It's gone again! :huh:  :D 

 

Happy days :wink: 

 

Len :thumbsup: 

Edited by LEN
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I remember DJing for the North East Soul Club in the 70s and turned up one night and the promoter/ DJ Alex had developed a way of setting the records without using record middles - so he hadn't brought any. I spent the whole set trying to centre the records so they played properly ( and wasn't entirely sucessful). On the rare occasions I do a spot these days I always take middles with me - just in case. 

I've had people 'impress' me with that technique.

Never in a month of Sundays would I attempt it. I've had countless middles go awol over the years.

The worst was someone nicked one of my Stussy reggae 7" box set centres when I was djing one night. It still hurts.

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 at my last outing i started my set well then played two bad records one got stuck (solid middle ) and the other played at wrong speed , put me off my pace for the last half hour of my set , am sure I am not the only one with occasional technical hiccups  but went away and could see the 

other jocks thinking " plonker " .Please help me regain my confidence ,any ideas ????

 

 at my last outing i started my set well then played two bad records one got stuck (solid middle ) and the other played at wrong speed , put me off my pace for the last half hour of my set , am sure I am not the only one with occasional technical hiccups  but went away and could see the 

other jocks thinking " plonker " .Please help me regain my confidence ,any ideas ????

frankie..a few years ago i was deejaying in a really flash soul club, l had a rough idea of what l was gonna play simply by listening to what the guy before me played (always a good idea) anyway at 9pm l took to the stage..opened by box and selected my first record..put it on the deck..cued it up and as the playing record came to an end l thanked the previous dj, announced my disc..pushed the start button and 30 seconds later the entire town suffered a power cut and the club illuminations went "fizzzzz" at exactly 2 minutes to 10pm the power came back on and l played the remaining 2 minutes of my first record. During the black-out l was subjected to the mother of all ridicule from people accusing me of sabotage and similar, this they did at a considerable distance from the stage..but the best of it is...l got payed extra for being calm under pressure (to be honest, l'd consumed a unknown quantity of jack daniels..and it was free !!) don't ever worry about cock-ups..sometimes they're a financial god send. so carry on deejaying but best of all..ENJOY YOURSELF.  Tony Warot

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frankie..a few years ago i was deejaying in a really flash soul club, l had a rough idea of what l was gonna play simply by listening to what the guy before me played (always a good idea) anyway at 9pm l took to the stage..opened by box and selected my first record..put it on the deck..cued it up and as the playing record came to an end l thanked the previous dj, announced my disc..pushed the start button and 30 seconds later the entire town suffered a power cut and the club illuminations went "fizzzzz" at exactly 2 minutes to 10pm the power came back on and l played the remaining 2 minutes of my first record. During the black-out l was subjected to the mother of all ridicule from people accusing me of sabotage and similar, this they did at a considerable distance from the stage..but the best of it is...l got payed extra for being calm under pressure (to be honest, l'd consumed a unknown quantity of jack daniels..and it was free !!) don't ever worry about cock-ups..sometimes they're a financial god send. so carry on deejaying but best of all..ENJOY YOURSELF.  Tony Warot

cheeers , great post will do !!!

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frankie..a few years ago i was deejaying in a really flash soul club, l had a rough idea of what l was gonna play simply by listening to what the guy before me played (always a good idea) anyway at 9pm l took to the stage..opened by box and selected my first record..put it on the deck..cued it up and as the playing record came to an end l thanked the previous dj, announced my disc..pushed the start button and 30 seconds later the entire town suffered a power cut and the club illuminations went "fizzzzz" at exactly 2 minutes to 10pm the power came back on and l played the remaining 2 minutes of my first record. During the black-out l was subjected to the mother of all ridicule from people accusing me of sabotage and similar, this they did at a considerable distance from the stage..but the best of it is...l got payed extra for being calm under pressure (to be honest, l'd consumed a unknown quantity of jack daniels..and it was free !!) don't ever worry about cock-ups..sometimes they're a financial god send. so carry on deejaying but best of all..ENJOY YOURSELF.  Tony Warot

 

What a lovely statement - I'll try my best Boss :wink: 

 

Len :thumbsup: 

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My classic was falling asleep whilst djing. It was my friend's son's 21st and I had been up all night the night before.

I was playing away, doing a good job  and , record box on the floor, knelt down to make my next selection and dozed off. Luckily the other Dj saw my predicament and took over for 2 or 3 records, I woke up , pulled out a selection and mixed into his record unaware that I had been fast asleep .

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frankie..a few years ago i was deejaying in a really flash soul club, l had a rough idea of what l was gonna play simply by listening to what the guy before me played (always a good idea) anyway at 9pm l took to the stage..opened by box and selected my first record..put it on the deck..cued it up and as the playing record came to an end l thanked the previous dj, announced my disc..pushed the start button and 30 seconds later the entire town suffered a power cut and the club illuminations went "fizzzzz" at exactly 2 minutes to 10pm the power came back on and l played the remaining 2 minutes of my first record. During the black-out l was subjected to the mother of all ridicule from people accusing me of sabotage and similar, this they did at a considerable distance from the stage..but the best of it is...l got payed extra for being calm under pressure (to be honest, l'd consumed a unknown quantity of jack daniels..and it was free !!) don't ever worry about cock-ups..sometimes they're a financial god send. so carry on deejaying but best of all..ENJOY YOURSELF.  Tony Warot

 

....sorry for the delay Tony...been away but it's clear your still enjoying yourself mate!!!x Nice 1...!x 

@@

~

LUV

SOOTY

X

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